I have sure missed you! I hope you have been doing well.
I’m back at work at the company Lee and I own. Business slowed to a screeching halt and I came back to help. I’ve been spending most of these last weeks wearing my Kim Lollis Parrish, President of ArrowHawk Industries, hat again. Honestly, I wasn’t too sure of myself when it came to putting it back on. As you know, I left ArrowHawk after a tired and weary winter. A friend of mine probably summed it up the best. She said I had been running non-stop trying to put out a fire in every room for so long that I had completely burned my own self down. It was true. I had.
My ArrowHawk head and hat had stopped feeling good or right. I knew when I came to the place that I was questioning myself on even the smallest decisions that I had to step aside. There were many things that lead to it. One of the last straws was settling out of court with BMW. I did not want to settle. I wanted us to have our day in court. But, it wasn’t just my decision and so I agreed to go along with our lawyers and those who were closest to the situation. In my mind, it would have been selfish go against the majority. That is what I told myself even though my gut was screaming that we should hold out a little longer.
When I walked out of the mediation, I lost trust in more than just the judicial system. I lost trust in me. I hope you have never known that feeling. It is quite unsettling. When you are in that space you hear your voice but find yourself leaning to others to tell you what to do. No one can ever tell you what direction you need to take better that your own sweet spirit. When you hear that little voice, don’t doubt it, trust it with all that you are.
It has taken awhile but little by little I have been learning to trust myself again. I’ve dug deep and rediscovered that sacred part of me that speaks so loudly it can’t be ignored. I now trust myself in ways I’m not sure I ever have. I know that I’m on the right track and my clarity is growing day by day.
In order to reach this point, I have had to change the way I had begun doing things. I now spend a minimum of 40 minutes a day meditating and praying and I no longer find myself so quick to ask everyone around me for their opinions. I’m listening to spirit speak and trusting the wisdom of my soul — knowing that it knows the way.
My three months off were wonderful and I will cherish that time for the rest of my life. Back then I didn’t think I could come back to ArrowHawk and write too. I now realize that it doesn’t have to be a choice between being an author or being a business owner. I can be both and do so successfully. I don’t have to choose one over the other. It took a lot of listening to the voice to finally come to that conclusion. I’m elated at the possibilities and find myself looking forward to the days in a whole new way.
Thank God for miracles! I have passion about being in charge of the business again and I feel more competent than ever. These days the ArrowHawk hat fits more comfortably than it has in quite a long time. I am more grateful for that than I can express.
Thank you for reading my posts and for being there. I feel your spirits with me and love you more than you could know.